Public Apology

Dear Guitar,

I'm sorry that I momentarily lost my mind and thought that I could pawn you for a little extra cash. People do crazy things in their time of need and I almost just gave you up. Please accept this apology. I'm glad that we can spend more time together and I forgive you for ripping my pinky finger to shreds every time we play. I promise to pay more attention to you if you promise to stay more in tune.

Looking forward to rocking the country,

Okie

Memory Lane

When I was 2 1/2 years old my brother joined the family (AKA was born). His addition turned our little clan into a full-blown, bonafide, "we have more than one child" family tree. When my parents brought him home from the hospital I thought he was pretty stellar for about .2 seconds, but as soon as I was done with him I told my mom and dad that they could take him back. Apparently kids aren't eligible for the "return to sender" policy, so to my infantile dismay he stuck around.

After this initial antipathy towards the new sib, my brother and I became fast friends. I have vivid memories of the two of us digging in the dirt in the garden (much to the chagrin of my father) and climbing on the roof to jump off of it (which my mom of course just loved). Our antics were endless; it wasn't until we were much older that we realized our names weren't "you little shits!" (thanks mom....).

Because we were so close it seems that whatever would befall one of us would inevitably take us both out. For this reason my memories include countless days of the two of us wrapped in blankets in the basement den watching Disney movies while trying to rid ourselves of the flu, or sipping 7-up to ease the strep throat that hit my family yearly like the plague. Then there was chicken pox, the coming of age disease that every kid secretly wanted just so you could say "yeah, I've already had the 'pox". We both ended up with the little spots of itchy-horror at the same time and one of my strongest memories of childhood is of my brother, sister, and I sitting in the den watching The Little Mermaid with pink Calamine lotion caked in polka dots on our skin and mismatched socks on our hands so wouldn't scratch ourselves to death. These are some of my favorite memories because they were literally hours on end that we got to play and just be brother and sister. This is perhaps one of the great blessings of being young without real responsibility: you can be with other people and just enjoy your time.

This week has afforded my brother and I another opportunity to recreate these moments. Although I'm sad Nate had to go through all the yucky stuff that is "open flank" surgery (ew), it's been great to be able to spend time with him. After class I stop in at his apartment, throw my bag on the ground and we immediately revert to just a brother and sister hanging out, watching movies on the couch and eating microwave Lean Pockets. In one month he will be married, and in 6 months I'll (hopefully) be living out of state. For right now though, we're still just a couple of little shits who enjoy each other's company.

Take the Plunge

Friday was my last day at what I will from here on out refer to as my "grown up" job. According to tradition, my final staff meeting was replaced by the 5 D's: dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge. Being the recruiter for the Mayan had it's perks and even in the end it 'done me good'... here are the pictures from the Mayan Adventure. (Click on the pictures to enlarge- they aren't as dark when they're bigger).

Scene 1: The Mayan Cliff. 21+ feet of cliff diving into the pool. Oh geez.



Step 2: The edge. Where I waited... and waited... and swore... and waited... This picture is completely false advertising. My thumbs were shaking... terror. TERROR I tell you!!


Step 3: The Pool. The water was great! I had only minor "shark attack" panic attacks in the water... perhaps that explains this curious look on my face?



Step 4: Frolic like children of the night! After the first plunge, we played on the rocks for about 30 minutes. Diving, climbing, swimming. All in a day's work! Thanks to Danielle, Jared, and Blake for playing with me at the Mayan and to the rest of HR and the Mayan management team for making it/ letting it happen! Great way to end my time there!! Too bad I didn't borrow the Mayan loin cloth-uniforms. Hmm....
*** NOTE ***

I know I don't work for the company anymore, but the HR in me tells me to post this. Jumping at the Mayan Restaurant is for divers ONLY. Please don't try this at home... or there for that matter. And if you do? Don't mention this blog...

I'm like the freaking Energizer Bunny of undergrads...

Just found out that I won't be graduating in December. In fact if I can't get into a certain class this semester, I won't be graduating until NEXT fall. 2009. That means it will have been 7 years from my H.S. diploma to my B.A. No, that's not a typo: SEVEN! Please people: light candles, face the east, fast, pray, chant, dance on tables with magic beads. Do what you have to do for me in this, my time of need- I NEED TO GRADUATE! My feelings are best described from our dear friends on Tommy Boy:

Tommy: Did you hear I graduated?
Richard: Yeah and just a shade under a decade. All right.
Tommy: A lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard: Yeah, they're called doctors.


... SHUT UP, Richard!!

I hate shopping for new clothes. I dislike the fact that I have to peruse the clothes racks and frequent fitting rooms only to find a pair of pants or shirt that I will love and adore for a few months only to lose interest in them and fling them to the dark black hole in the corner of my closet, thus resulting in the need for another shopping spree. It's a vicious cycle for me because my taste in clothing is constantly changing. I've been through many styles in my life: the baggy Mossimo shirt days, the knit sweater vests, the button down, the t-shirt, business casual, business, casual, hippie, "tom boy" (whatever that is). Heck, I even went 18 months on hardcore skirt wearing. My styles and interests in clothes change, and as they do I'm constantly back at the store wanting more. I harbor ill will towards clothes shopping for this reason: I know that it will never be enough. I will never NOT need more clothes. And I'm not even a shopaholic. My taste in style just changes, so I have to keep going back. Every year or so my entire wardrobe gets a pretty good face lift as I replace the old with the new. There are a few classics I hang on to but the rest goes to Goodwill, DI, or Salvation Army, depending on state and location at the time of tornadic-like restyling.

This is something that I've learned to deal with, but most recently in my life I've realized a horrifying fact about myself: It's not just my wardrobe that get's a strong cleaning once every year or so- my entire life seems to reflect this thinking. Just as my style of clothing ebbs and flows, it seems that my thoughts about life and all within it have been permanently buckled into a seat on a never ending roller coaster. It's up, it's down, it's all around- constantly changing. So here I sit in the aftermath of another "tornadic-like restyling" of my life and I'm looking around at the changes thinking: what is my deal!!

Will it ever be enough? I don't know the answer to that question but I do know this: my butt looks great in the jeans that I'm in. I couldn't be happier to have finally quit my job. And I feel like I'm being more honest in my life right now than I have been in a very long time. I've always loved roller coasters, anyway.

Details in the Fabric

I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. When this happens I find that I can’t really express my thoughts as well as others can. So, here are my thoughts for the day brought to you by Jason Mraz:

Hold your own. Know your name. Go your own way. Everything will be fine.

Amen, brother. Thank you for this song...

Nana's Box

The thing that makes my life so charmed is that I have always been surrounded by amazing people. A friend from USU put together a non-profit group to create photo boxes to give to people who are undergoing cancer treatments. Check out the website here or copy and paste it into your browser: http://nanasboxnonprofit.blogspot.com/.

Here's to making a difference. Angie- thanks for a constant example of how to live life deliberately. You are amazing.