I hate shopping for new clothes. I dislike the fact that I have to peruse the clothes racks and frequent fitting rooms only to find a pair of pants or shirt that I will love and adore for a few months only to lose interest in them and fling them to the dark black hole in the corner of my closet, thus resulting in the need for another shopping spree. It's a vicious cycle for me because my taste in clothing is constantly changing. I've been through many styles in my life: the baggy Mossimo shirt days, the knit sweater vests, the button down, the t-shirt, business casual, business, casual, hippie, "tom boy" (whatever that is). Heck, I even went 18 months on hardcore skirt wearing. My styles and interests in clothes change, and as they do I'm constantly back at the store wanting more. I harbor ill will towards clothes shopping for this reason: I know that it will never be enough. I will never NOT need more clothes. And I'm not even a shopaholic. My taste in style just changes, so I have to keep going back. Every year or so my entire wardrobe gets a pretty good face lift as I replace the old with the new. There are a few classics I hang on to but the rest goes to Goodwill, DI, or Salvation Army, depending on state and location at the time of tornadic-like restyling.

This is something that I've learned to deal with, but most recently in my life I've realized a horrifying fact about myself: It's not just my wardrobe that get's a strong cleaning once every year or so- my entire life seems to reflect this thinking. Just as my style of clothing ebbs and flows, it seems that my thoughts about life and all within it have been permanently buckled into a seat on a never ending roller coaster. It's up, it's down, it's all around- constantly changing. So here I sit in the aftermath of another "tornadic-like restyling" of my life and I'm looking around at the changes thinking: what is my deal!!

Will it ever be enough? I don't know the answer to that question but I do know this: my butt looks great in the jeans that I'm in. I couldn't be happier to have finally quit my job. And I feel like I'm being more honest in my life right now than I have been in a very long time. I've always loved roller coasters, anyway.